Seeing yourself in the best possible light

Many academics (among others) are acquainted with Imposter Syndrome, which Ellen Hendriksen calls "the low, constant rumbling of insecurity, fraudulence, or self-doubt that strikes successful individuals." I have to admit that I've recently felt pangs of that syndrome myself as I've been on the hunt for my next position. For those who don't know, seeing academic positions typically starts early, about a year before ones current position is scheduled to end. Despite this buffer, the net result-at least for me-is to feel the pressure throughout the entire process.

What directly inspires this post, however, was a pleasant experience! While talking to a professor who may advise my next position, they pointed out something that they liked from my CV. "I expected to see a list of papers with your main advisor as a co-author, but instead I saw a different co-author on each paper. I love that! I think it shows great versatility." As we talked and I explained more how different each of my papers to date has been, they were only more impressed. Here, as saying goes, is the rub: I don't recall ever seeing that pattern in such a good light!

That experienced inspired this post, which I should say, up front, is largely borrowed (with added personal reflections) from an article by Dr. Ellen Hendriksen, a psychologist at Boston University's Center for Anxiety and Related Disorders, which can be found here. On a personal level, I've taken it as a new challenge to always see myself in the best possible light. To be clear, this isn't about misrepresentation; rather, it's about recognizing that there can be multiple ways to value the same objective facts, and it's imperative for our own success and health to internalize the legitimate view with the best lighting, so to speak.

It turns out that there are some common sources for Imposter Syndrome. One is high praise from your parents. When they praise you for being "smart", for example, it implies that it's something you have, or don't have. When you receive the rare bad grade or a professional setback, that makes it easier to reclassify yourself among the "have nots". An alternative suggestion is that parents emphasize the process, such as praising your hard work. Another common source is feeling like an outsider. Whether because of ones gender, race, or any other fundamental identity, feeling different can, tragically, compound feelings of illegitimacy. Personally, even as a white male, I've certainly felt like an outsider at a times, and I can only imagine how much worse it must be for others. A third common source is a consequence of meritocracy. If one grows up always being top of the class, that encourages one to value comparison and be especially sensitive to it. Then, when one reaches a rarified place where they are surrounded by their peers, they no longer feel special, by comparison, and their self worth can take the hit.

Dr. Hendriksen gives these 8 tips:

1. Know the feeling is normal, even felt my Nobel prize winners!
2. Consciously remind yourself of everything that you have accomplished.
   And I would add, consciously choose to view those accomplishments in the best possible light.
3. Tell a trusted friend, mentor, or close colleague. The encouragement of a fan does good for the soul.
4. Seek out a mentor for guidance, especially someone who shares your fundamental identities.
5. Mentor others! Doing this can remind you just how far you've come.
6. Remember that conducting scientific research, by definition, means learning and pushing the bounds of our understanding. It's only natural to feel like you don't know what you're doing. Take that a good sign.
7. Expect initial failure. The path from A to B won't be a straight one. It hardly ever is, especially in research.
8. Don't overshoot. Even while building up your self-esteem, be sure to maintain an objective and honest assessment of how you can be better. We're all works in progress.